21 Tips on Keeping a Simple Home with Kids

Every Wednesday is Simplicity Day on Zen Habits, this is the fourth post in a series called Creating Simple Systems. Also see the series, “Edit Your Life.”

Any parent knows that kids create clutter like nobody’s business.

It’s enough to drive a simplifier such as myself crazy. Still, with a little diligence, and a little bit of Zen detachment, it’s possible to have a simple, (relatively) uncluttered home as well as peace of mind.

Reader Christa recently asked:

As a mother of 4, I have to ask how you manage to simpify, declutter and live a minimalist lifestyle with 6 children. It seems we have toys everywhere, and the kids stuff accumulates into every room of the house. What is your system for their stuff?

Let me first state the obvious: any life that includes children is going to be complicated, at least to some degree. You’ll never get an absolute minimalist lifestyle with kids, and I’ve learned to accept that. While my minimalist inner self would like to live without a car, a cell phone, or a large house, my kids preclude those things from happening.

However, I have found ways to simplify my house, including the kids’ rooms. Sure, the house still gets messy — especially their rooms. But it’s not as bad as it once was, and it’s at a manageable level.

Here are my tips for simplifying your home with kids:

Identify the important. The first step in decluttering is identifying which toys and other possessions are truly important to the kids. What do they play with, what do they love? Then get rid of as much of the rest as possible, keeping only those they use and love.
Massively purge. In the beginning, if you have a lot of kid clutter, you’ll want to go through a massive purge. The way to do this is to block off a day to go through their rooms. Do one area at a time: a drawer, a section of the closet, a shelf. Take everything out of that area, put it in a pile. From that pile, take only the really important stuff (See Tip 1). Get rid of the rest. Donate it to charity if it’s still good. Get some boxes and put all the stuff to donate in there, and when they’re full, load them up in your car to donate on your next trip. Then put back the important stuff, and tackle the next area. If you do this quickly, you can do a room in a couple of hours.
Leave space. When you put the important stuff back, don’t try to fill up each drawer, shelf or closet area. Allow there to be some space around the objects. It’s much nicer looking, and it leaves room for a couple of extra items later if necessary.
Contain. The key for us has been to contain the kid clutter. We only let them keep their stuff in their rooms. The living room, kitchen and dining room are for household stuff only. We do have a play area for the two toddlers, and their stuff gets spread throughout the house, but still, we try to contain the kid stuff to certain areas only. This leaves our living area very simple and minimal.
Bins. These are the best type of containers for kids stuff, in general. Bins or baskets. The key is to make it easy for the kids (or you) to toss their stuff into the bins, making cleanup simple. Label each bin, if possible, with the type of stuff that goes there (blocks, stuffed animals, Legos, instruments of destruction). If your child can’t read, use picture labels.
Cubbies. We have a small plastic 3-drawer organizer (we call them “cubbies”) for each child. They don’t take up much room in the closets, and it allows them to have a place to put their little odds and ends that would otherwise be all over the place.
A home for everything. We haven’t actually completely succeeded at this, but we try to teach the kids that everything they own has a “home”. This means that if they’re going to put away a toy, they should know where its home is, and put it there. If they don’t know where the home is, they need to find a home for it, and put it there from now on. Actually, this is a useful concept for adults, too, and it’s one that I’ve mastered and found very useful. Our kids understand this idea (at least, the four older ones do), but sometimes they forget. Still, it helps keep things organized.
Organize like with like. Try to keep similar things organized together. So, one bin for stuffed animals, another for sports stuff. This makes it easier to remember. Same thing with clothes: underwear and socks together, shirts, shorts, pants, etc. All video game stuff in one place.
One place for school papers. Similarly, you should have one place to keep all incoming school papers. We have an inbox for all incoming papers in our house, but we also keep a folder to store school papers, so we never have to search for them. Also, when we get a school calendar or a notification of some school event, we enter it in our Google Calendar, so we never forget when stuff is.
Teach them to clean. Our 1-year-old daughter, Noelle, doesn’t know how to clean up after herself. But all of the other 5 kids do, including our 3-year-old. So, instead of us continually stressing out about the messes, we just ask them to clean up now and then. Sure, things will get messy again soon. But at least the kids are doing the work cleaning up, not us. :)
Allow them to mess. Kids are not perfect. They will inevitably make a mess. You have to allow them to do this. Then, when they’re done, ask them to clean it up. No harm, no foul.
Purge at Christmas, birthdays. On these two occasions, new stuff comes into their lives en masse. If you just add this new stuff to their old stuff, you will have a huge mess. Instead, we ask them to put all their gifts in one place. Then, a day or two after Christmas or their birthday, we go through their closets and bins and ask them what they want to get rid of so they can make room for the new stuff.
Do regular decluttering. Every month or two, you’ll need to declutter their stuff. See Tip 1. Do it at least quarterly. You could put a reminder in your calendar, or just look at their rooms every now and then, and if it looks way too cluttered, schedule some time to do some purging.
Less is more. Teach the kids that they don’t need to have huge piles of stuff to be happy. They can’t possibly play with everything anyway — there aren’t enough hours in the day. With less stuff, they can find things more easily, they can see what there is to play with, and they can own better quality stuff (see next tip).
Go for quality. Instead of getting them a huge pile of cheap junk, go for quality toys or possessions that will last long. Wood is better than plastic, for example. The classic toys are often the best. It’s best to spend your money on a couple of great things than a whole bunch of cheap things that will break and be relegated to the junk pile in no time.
Learn to accept. You’ll never have a minimal life with kids. You have to accept that. It can be difficult for a minimalist like me, but you can learn that being a harpie parent isn’t as fun as being one that just enjoys their child’s company.
Buy less. Drastically reduce the amount of stuff you buy for your kids. It’s difficult to resist them when they really want something at a store, I know, but you aren’t doing them any favors by caving in. Don’t deprive them completely, but also don’t spoil them with stuff. On Christmas, for example, just get them a few great things rather than a whole bunch of stuff.
Clean as you go. I’ve learned to clean up messes as I go (or ask the kids to clean up their mess), so that the house is never a wreck.
Clean before bed. I also do a quick clean-up right before I go to bed, getting any little things the little ones forgot to put away. It makes my mornings much more pleasant.
30-minute cleanups. On Saturdays, do a “30-minute cleanup”. This means that every child (over 5 years old probably) has a chore, and the whole family (including parents) pitch in to clean up the house. Set a timer, and see if you can do it all in 30 minutes. That’s much easier for our family to accomplish, as we have six people (including two adults and a teenager) pitching in to finish quickly. This gives us a clean house and the rest of the day to have fun.
Prep time. This isn’t so much to do with clutter as with general simplifying your life with kids. It helps to have prep time each evening and morning to prepare the kids’ lunches, clothes, or whatever is needed for whatever we’re doing that day. This means we get the soccer gear and drinks and snacks ready on soccer days, or whatever gear is necessary for the activities of the day. It saves a rush when you are trying to get out the door, and saves you from forgetting stuff later.

See also:

21 Tips on Keeping a Simple Home with Kids

Every Wednesday is Simplicity Day on Zen Habits, this is the fourth post in a series called Creating Simple Systems. Also see the series, “Edit Your Life.”

Any parent knows that kids create clutter like nobody’s business.

Reader Christa recently asked:

As a mother of 4, I have to ask how you manage to simpify, declutter and live a minimalist lifestyle with 6 children. It seems we have toys everywhere, and the kids stuff accumulates into every room of the house. What is your system for their stuff?

Here are my tips for simplifying your home with kids:

Identify the important. The first step in decluttering is identifying which toys and other possessions are truly important to the kids. What do they play with, what do they love? Then get rid of as much of the rest as possible, keeping only those they use and love.
Massively purge. In the beginning, if you have a lot of kid clutter, you’ll want to go through a massive purge. The way to do this is to block off a day to go through their rooms. Do one area at a time: a drawer, a section of the closet, a shelf. Take everything out of that area, put it in a pile. From that pile, take only the really important stuff (See Tip 1). Get rid of the rest. Donate it to charity if it’s still good. Get some boxes and put all the stuff to donate in there, and when they’re full, load them up in your car to donate on your next trip. Then put back the important stuff, and tackle the next area. If you do this quickly, you can do a room in a couple of hours.
Leave space. When you put the important stuff back, don’t try to fill up each drawer, shelf or closet area. Allow there to be some space around the objects. It’s much nicer looking, and it leaves room for a couple of extra items later if necessary.
Contain. The key for us has been to contain the kid clutter. We only let them keep their stuff in their rooms. The living room, kitchen and dining room are for household stuff only. We do have a play area for the two toddlers, and their stuff gets spread throughout the house, but still, we try to contain the kid stuff to certain areas only. This leaves our living area very simple and minimal.
Bins. These are the best type of containers for kids stuff, in general. Bins or baskets. The key is to make it easy for the kids (or you) to toss their stuff into the bins, making cleanup simple. Label each bin, if possible, with the type of stuff that goes there (blocks, stuffed animals, Legos, instruments of destruction). If your child can’t read, use picture labels.
Cubbies. We have a small plastic 3-drawer organizer (we call them “cubbies”) for each child. They don’t take up much room in the closets, and it allows them to have a place to put their little odds and ends that would otherwise be all over the place.
A home for everything. We haven’t actually completely succeeded at this, but we try to teach the kids that everything they own has a “home”. This means that if they’re going to put away a toy, they should know where its home is, and put it there. If they don’t know where the home is, they need to find a home for it, and put it there from now on. Actually, this is a useful concept for adults, too, and it’s one that I’ve mastered and found very useful. Our kids understand this idea (at least, the four older ones do), but sometimes they forget. Still, it helps keep things organized.
Organize like with like. Try to keep similar things organized together. So, one bin for stuffed animals, another for sports stuff. This makes it easier to remember. Same thing with clothes: underwear and socks together, shirts, shorts, pants, etc. All video game stuff in one place.
One place for school papers. Similarly, you should have one place to keep all incoming school papers. We have an inbox for all incoming papers in our house, but we also keep a folder to store school papers, so we never have to search for them. Also, when we get a school calendar or a notification of some school event, we enter it in our Google Calendar, so we never forget when stuff is.
Teach them to clean. Our 1-year-old daughter, Noelle, doesn’t know how to clean up after herself. But all of the other 5 kids do, including our 3-year-old. So, instead of us continually stressing out about the messes, we just ask them to clean up now and then. Sure, things will get messy again soon. But at least the kids are doing the work cleaning up, not us. :)
Allow them to mess. Kids are not perfect. They will inevitably make a mess. You have to allow them to do this. Then, when they’re done, ask them to clean it up. No harm, no foul.
Purge at Christmas, birthdays. On these two occasions, new stuff comes into their lives en masse. If you just add this new stuff to their old stuff, you will have a huge mess. Instead, we ask them to put all their gifts in one place. Then, a day or two after Christmas or their birthday, we go through their closets and bins and ask them what they want to get rid of so they can make room for the new stuff.
Do regular decluttering. Every month or two, you’ll need to declutter their stuff. See Tip 1. Do it at least quarterly. You could put a reminder in your calendar, or just look at their rooms every now and then, and if it looks way too cluttered, schedule some time to do some purging.
Less is more. Teach the kids that they don’t need to have huge piles of stuff to be happy. They can’t possibly play with everything anyway — there aren’t enough hours in the day. With less stuff, they can find things more easily, they can see what there is to play with, and they can own better quality stuff (see next tip).
Go for quality. Instead of getting them a huge pile of cheap junk, go for quality toys or possessions that will last long. Wood is better than plastic, for example. The classic toys are often the best. It’s best to spend your money on a couple of great things than a whole bunch of cheap things that will break and be relegated to the junk pile in no time.
Learn to accept. You’ll never have a minimal life with kids. You have to accept that. It can be difficult for a minimalist like me, but you can learn that being a harpie parent isn’t as fun as being one that just enjoys their child’s company.
Buy less. Drastically reduce the amount of stuff you buy for your kids. It’s difficult to resist them when they really want something at a store, I know, but you aren’t doing them any favors by caving in. Don’t deprive them completely, but also don’t spoil them with stuff. On Christmas, for example, just get them a few great things rather than a whole bunch of stuff.
Clean as you go. I’ve learned to clean up messes as I go (or ask the kids to clean up their mess), so that the house is never a wreck.
Clean before bed. I also do a quick clean-up right before I go to bed, getting any little things the little ones forgot to put away. It makes my mornings much more pleasant.
30-minute cleanups. On Saturdays, do a “30-minute cleanup”. This means that every child (over 5 years old probably) has a chore, and the whole family (including parents) pitch in to clean up the house. Set a timer, and see if you can do it all in 30 minutes. That’s much easier for our family to accomplish, as we have six people (including two adults and a teenager) pitching in to finish quickly. This gives us a clean house and the rest of the day to have fun.
Prep time. This isn’t so much to do with clutter as with general simplifying your life with kids. It helps to have prep time each evening and morning to prepare the kids’ lunches, clothes, or whatever is needed for whatever we’re doing that day. This means we get the soccer gear and drinks and snacks ready on soccer days, or whatever gear is necessary for the activities of the day. It saves a rush when you are trying to get out the door, and saves you from forgetting stuff later.

See also:

Posted on 8 August 2007 in Simplicity |
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Comments (14)

Jose Says:

August 8th, 2007, 10:27 am

I just got married in July….these tips are priceless to me, thanks.

Bookmarked!

Christa Says:

August 8th, 2007, 11:24 am

Great Advice. I took notes!!

Kate Says:

August 8th, 2007, 15:51 pm

Great advice — I am a mom of only one but boy oh boy (or girl oh girl, rather), is our place a complete mess of toys by each evening’s end. Thanks for helping me keep it simple…

munky Says:

August 8th, 2007, 23:13 pm

Way to go to suck the joy out of childhood…

21st Century Mummy Says:

August 9th, 2007, 16:01 pm

Leo - thanks so much. This is the one area of our family lifestyle that makes me despair so much that I often dread the run-up to birthdays and Christmas because of the mass of stuff that comes from friends and family. Now, I feel empowered to sort it out, so we can enjoy this year’s festivities with ease.

Erin Says:

August 9th, 2007, 23:11 pm

Great advice. Another thing that has worked wonders for some of my friends is to have a cleaning timer. Set the timer for 15 minutes or so and have everyone clean and declutter for that time. It’s nice to know it won’t drag on forever.

Another excellent decluttering for kids 4 and older is to have a garage sale and give them the money for their things they sold. This way they can turn 10 old toys into 1 new toy. It works wonders!

Leo Says:

August 14th, 2007, 19:36 pm

@munky … I think you’re being facetious, but if not, let me just say that the joy of childhood isn’t about stuff, it’s about having fun, loving, learning, growing, enjoying life. And I’ve taught my kids how to have fun in many ways, without needing the stuff (actually, they’ve taught me just as much as I’ve taught them).

MamaDee Says:

August 16th, 2007, 11:25 am

Great article! As the Mom of 4 kids I learned the beauty of keeping a minimilist home after moving to another country only allowing them to take clothes and a few precious items. After moving back to America I realized people have way too much stuff.

I’ve found it easy to keep things uncluttered in our shared living spaces by keeping cubbies (with doors) for the stuff that needs to be on hand for school and making sure things that migrate from their rooms make it back to their rooms when they are done. Also, their rooms are THEIR sanctuaries and except for regular purging of clothes, etc. they can keep whatever they truly love!

Ariane Benefit, Neat & Simple Living Says:

August 19th, 2007, 18:02 pm

GREAT advice Leo! You could be a professional organizer!! : )

mia Says:

September 19th, 2007, 8:39 am

I would just like to give one very simple word of caution, and if it seems obvious to you remember that to many it is not. KEEP YOUR KIDS IN THE LOOP. I grew up with a decluttering mother who constantly gave my things away to charity without consulting me, and I can tell you that doing that will not only hurt your children, but make them feel out of control of their own lives. Make it a fun game, but don’t force them, and don’t cajole them into getting rid of something of they aren’t ready.

Emma Says:

October 3rd, 2007, 7:48 am

What a great article, I have a 17month old so this is all stuff I can start to teach him now. The bins are a great idea. Getting rid of stuff he no longer plays with will also be happening soon!

Good info for now and to go into the future with. Hopefully we’ll be able to build good habits together.

Caroline Says:

October 30th, 2007, 12:24 pm

I have three girls who share a bedroom. Each girl has a bed, a nightside table and lamp, 4 feet of clothes hanging space, and a couple of deep shelves in an armoire for their personal things. This is how I managed this in one room: I found a design for a triple bunk bed. http://www.lungster.com/l/woodwork/triplebunk/triplebunk.shtml
My two younger girls have one hanging rod each in the regular closet (which has two hanging rods for more space). My oldest girl has an IKEA armoire that’s about 4 feet wide for her clothes, and a chest. The two younger girls also have an armoire with shelves for their folded clothes and things. So basically, each girl has an armoire which she can fill up as she chooses. If there’s no room left, then she has to learn to purge. They also have a tiny playroom that used to be our porch. We now have much more disposable income because of our tiny two bedroom house. My kids can each take two classes of their choosing each week, which I think is important, because we have more money to spend. We live in my old grandmother’s house, and have a sweet rental bargain because of it. I plan to give my kids the same gift - an offer to rent a house I own when they grow up. The money will stay in the family and won’t go off to some mortgage bank.

Lisa Says:

October 30th, 2007, 15:10 pm

It can also help to eliminate that consumerist impulse in kids early on. Here in Vancouver there is a bit of a movement underfoot to raise brand-free kids.

Here is an article that talks more about it:
http://thetyee.ca/Life/2007/10/30/No-Logo-Kiddo/

Janice Says:

November 19th, 2007, 12:56 pm

Great advice. We have 15 month old twins and its amazing how much you can teach them to help out. Our babies always “clean” their highchair trays with wipes before and after meals. They instigated this by trying to grab the wipes when I was doing the work. So now I let them. It isn’t perfect, but they are at an age where cleaning is still fun–so I figure, capitalize on it!