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8 Tremendously Important Ways That Gratitude Can Change Your Life

“If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, “thank you,” that would suffice.” - Meister Eckhart

It’s amazing how one simple, easy, positive action can change so much in a person’s life.

One of the things that has had the biggest effect on my life is the realization of the power of gratitude. Simply giving thanks.

It has affected everything. It has made me a more positive person. A more productive person. A better achiever. A better husband and father and son and brother (at least, I like to think so). A happier person. I’m not perfect, but gratitude has made me better.

Can it change your life as well? I can guarantee it. You might not get the exact same benefits as I have, but there’s no doubt in my mind that the simple act of gratitude on a regular basis will change anyone’s life, positively and immediately. How many other changes can claim to be that quick, that easy, and that profound?

Let’s take a look at some of the ways you can incorporate gratitude into your life, and how it will change your life. These are just some examples, based on my experience and the experiences of others I’ve talked with, and not all will apply to your life. But pick and choose the ones you think will work for you.

1. Have a morning gratitude session. Take one minute in the morning (make it a daily ritual) to think of the people who have done something nice for you, to think of all the things in your life you’re grateful for. You won’t get to everything in one minute, but it’s enough. And it will instantly make your day better, and help you start your day off right. Can you think of a better use of one minute?

2. When you’re having a hard day … make a gratitude list. We all have those bad days sometimes. We are stressed out from work. We get yelled at by someone. We lose a loved one. We hurt a loved one. We lose a contract or do poorly on a project. One of the things that can make a bad day much better is making a list of all the things you’re thankful for. There are always things to be thankful for — loved ones, health, having a job, having a roof over your head and clothes on your back, life itself.

3. Instead of getting mad at someone, show gratitude. That’s a major switching of attitudes — actually a complete flip. And so this isn’t always easy to do. But I can promise you that it’s a great thing to do. If you get mad at your co-worker, for example, because of something he or she did … bite your tongue and don’t react in anger. Instead, take some deep breaths, calm down, and try to think of reasons you’re grateful for that person. Has that person done anything nice for you? Has that person ever done a good job? Find something, anything, even if it’s difficult. Focus on those things that make you grateful. It will slowly change your mood. And if you get in a good enough mood, show your gratitude to that person. It will improve your mood, your relationship, and help make things better. After showing gratitude, you can ask for a favor — can he please refrain from shredding your important documents in the future? And in the context of your gratitude, such a favor isn’t such a hard thing for the co-worker to grant.

4. Instead of criticising your significant other, show gratitude. This is basically the same as the above tactic, but I wanted to point out how gratitude can transform a marriage or relationship. If you constantly criticize your spouse, your marriage will slowly deteriorate — I promise you. It’s important to be able to talk out problems, but no one likes to be criticized all the time. Instead, when you find yourself feeling the urge to criticize, stop and take a deep breath. Calm down, and think about all the reasons you’re grateful for your spouse. Then share that gratitude, as soon as possible. Your relationship will become stronger. Your spouse will learn from your example — especially if you do this all the time. Your love will grow, and all will be right in the world.

5. Instead of complaining about your kids, be grateful for them. Many parents (myself included) get frustrated with their children. They are too slow to do things, they have a bad attitude, they can’t clean up after themselves, and they pick their nose too much. Unfortunately, sometimes parents will communicate that frustration to their children too often, and the kids will begin to feel bad about themselves. Many parents have done this, and while it’s not perfect, it’s a part of parenthood. But there’s a better way: follow the method above of calming down when you’re frustrated, and thinking of reasons you’re grateful to your child. Share these reasons with your child. And then take the opportunity to teach them, instead of criticizing them.

6. When you face a major challenge, be grateful for it. Many people will see something difficult as a bad thing. If something goes wrong, it’s a reason to complain, it’s a time of self-pity. That won’t get you anywhere. Instead, learn to be grateful for the challenge — it’s an opportunity to grow, to learn, to get better at something. This will transform you from a complainer into a positive person who only continues to improve. People will like you better and you’ll improve your career. Not too shabby.

7. When you suffer a tragedy, be grateful for the life you still have. I’ve recently lost an aunt, and my children recently lost a grandmother. These tragedies can be crippling if you let them overcome you. And while I’m not saying you shouldn’t grieve — of course you should — you can also take away something even greater from these tragedies: gratitude for the life you still have. Appreciation for the fleeting beauty of life itself. Love for the people who are still in your life. Take this opportunity to show appreciation to these people, and to enjoy life while you can.

8. Instead of looking at what you don’t have, look at what you do have. Have you ever looked around you and bemoaned how little you have? How the place you live isn’t your dream house, or the car you drive isn’t as nice as you’d like, or your peers have cooler gadgets or better jobs? If so, that’s an opportunity to be grateful for what you already have. It’s easy to forget that there are billions of people worse off than you — who don’t have much in the way of shelter or clothes, who don’t own a car and never will, who don’t own a gadget or even know what one is, who don’t have a job at all or only have very menial, miserable jobs in sweatshop conditions. Compare your life to these people’s lives, and be grateful for the life you have. And realize that it’s already more than enough, that happiness is not a destination — it’s already here.

“Everyday, think as you wake up, today I am fortunate to be alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it. I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others; to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings. I am going to have kind thoughts towards others, I am not going to get angry or think badly about others. I am going to benefit others as much as I can.” - Dalai Lama

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8 Tremendously Important Ways That Gratitude Can Change Your Life

“If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, “thank you,” that would suffice.” - Meister Eckhart

It’s amazing how one simple, easy, positive action can change so much in a person’s life.

One of the things that has had the biggest effect on my life is the realization of the power of gratitude. Simply giving thanks.

“Everyday, think as you wake up, today I am fortunate to be alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it. I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others; to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings. I am going to have kind thoughts towards others, I am not going to get angry or think badly about others. I am going to benefit others as much as I can.” - Dalai Lama

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If you liked this article, please share it on del.icio.us, StumbleUpon or Digg. I’d appreciate it. :)

Posted on 27 October 2008 in Happiness |
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Comments (74)

Your friendly Neighborhood Computer Guy Says:

October 27th, 2008, 22:42 pm

This is such an important aspect in life, but it’s SO hard to practice on a daily basis. The older I get, the more jaded I feel myself getting, and the harder it is for me to be grateful for the simple everyday things in life. But I try….and I’m GRATEFUL that there’re folks like you that can help remind us to keep making the effort to take the high road in life. I especially like how you challenge us to flip the script and be grateful for people or things that would normally cause us grief. Anger is a “choice” and it’s rarely the most productive choice.

Bryant Hankins Says:

October 27th, 2008, 22:45 pm

It’s so true that you can really control your happiness or sadness based on based on your level of gratitude.

In fact, books like “Happier” emphasize that one of the best ways to stay happy is to keep a gratitude journal. Often people work so hard for things and don’t take the time to enjoy the success without moving onto the next thing…

Thanks for the post!

johnlazy Says:

October 27th, 2008, 22:57 pm

Things happen in life, you can’t control all things but surely you can decide on what action and reaction you pursue. Happiness lies within your soul the contentment that only you can regulate.

BM Says:

October 27th, 2008, 22:58 pm

Like the post. People sometimes don’t understand how much people love being thanked for something they did or didn’t do

Evita Says:

October 27th, 2008, 23:01 pm

Leo - your words speak one of the greatest universal truths!

You do not have to convince me of gratitude as I see and feel its presence and effects all around me. I really cannot think of a better way to live!

So many people in our world today complain and get sad or disappointed by the most trivial things and let this usually take them down a spiral of negative emotions. And to think all this could be turned around by focusing and being thankful for all the good in one’s life.

I think the most important lesson I have ever learned that ties into this - is that happiness indeed comes from our own actions - and actions like gratitude only make life more beautiful, fulfilling and heavenly!

Adam R. Paul Says:

October 27th, 2008, 23:09 pm

How true. In one of the yoga classes I take, my teacher has recently been emphasizing the importance of gratitude, so this post is very au courant. I try in my daily life to be cognizant of my blessings generally, but it’s been very helpful to focus even more on the things for which I can be grateful.

It’s quite amazing how two people in very similar situations can have totally different takes on the abundance of their life based on their attitude. I see this in my intimate relationships, as well as friendly and casual ones.

A Dawn Says:

October 27th, 2008, 23:21 pm

I always meet people who are complaining about everything happening in their lives - from A to Z. A lot of times we fail to realize how lucky we are just live a healthy and normal life. I try to live each day to its fullest and always thank God or Nature for giving me food, shelter , and good heath. I try to enjoy and express gratitude for tiny things we usually never notice such as a gentle breeze, a speck of sunlight, a piece of cloud, blue skies, quiet moments sipping a cup of coffee at my favorite coffee shop… etc. These daily simple things make me happy and I thank God and treasure all these precious things I have in my life.
Cheers,
A Dawn Journal
http://www.adawnjournal.com

Bud Hennekes Says:

October 27th, 2008, 23:30 pm

Leo, I too have found by showing gratitude the quality of my life has increased tremendously. So often we forget what we have and as a result, are miserable. By making a conscious effort to show gratitude our life’s instantly improve.

Last year, when I witnessed the death of my good friend Marco in a jet-ski accident, I was presented with two paths. One path led me down a road of sadness and anger. The other one called for me to appreciate the short time in which he was in my life. Fortunately I was able to choose the later path, and as a result have reflected on the things in which mean the most to me.

By making an effort to use gratitude in my life on a daily basis my “bad” days have been almost non existent.

I am so glad you have learned how to incorporate gratitude into your life. :)

I wrote a post on gratitude on my blog as well!

Wesley Says:

October 27th, 2008, 23:37 pm

These are 8 ways to show gratitude, not 8 ways in which it will change your life.

Leo Says:

October 27th, 2008, 23:41 pm

Thanks for sharing your thoughts and experiences, everyone! It’s cool to find others who have discovered the same things I have. :)

@Wesley: Actually it’s both — ways to show gratitude, but also ways that they’ll change your life. For example, the first item is a way for gratitude to improve your day, every day. The second item is a way to turn a bad day into a better day. Etc.

Pete Says:

October 27th, 2008, 23:48 pm

Hi Leo:

Another great post that got me thinking about how lucky I am to have found the Zen mindset. One point I disagree with though is the comparison you made between what you have and what others have. Comparing yourself to poorer people and feeling ‘good’ about that isn’t right. That’s like saying that wealthier people should be happier than you, which is clearly not the case. (Scientific studies agree!) Happiness is individual and absolute. Although I’m in a relatively comfortable position in life, I’d like to think that even if our current recession turned into the next great depression, I would be content with my life, whatever that was: Happiness isn’t defined by external constraints - it’s in my mind.

Please keep the great posts coming, Pete

Leo Says:

October 27th, 2008, 23:55 pm

@Pete: Good point, and thanks for giving me the opportunity to clarify what I meant!

I didn’t mean that we should be happy that we’re better off than poor people. What I meant was that we should realize that we actually have a lot — enough to be happy already. I’m actually not a fan of comparing yourself to others, but looking at the lives of poorer people is just a way to remind yourself that you already have a lot (instead of thinking that you have very little). Again, the key point is to focus on what you have and not what you don’t.

Thanks for bringing this up!

Vincent Says:

October 28th, 2008, 0:14 am

Nice article. Showing gratitude definitely changes our mindset and we will definitely start to see better things coming our way.

Cheers
Vincent
Personal Development Blogger

Pete Says:

October 28th, 2008, 0:19 am

Hi Leo:

I didn’t mean to be negative. I guess my point was more toward the philosophy that you have what you have and should be happy with that. It’s a bit of a catch 22 for me because, on one hand, I want to make enough money to support my family in a comfortable way, but on the other hand, I only need enough to sustain life, beyond which, we should be able to be happy.

I’m still coming to grips with the zen stuff! Please keep up the great posts.

-Pete

Success Professor - Danny Gamache Says:

October 28th, 2008, 0:23 am

Leo,
What a wonderful list. You have some great ideas about ways to be thankful for what you have, and some concrete ways that it can change your life.

I can second your guarantee about how gratitude can make your life better. I recently shared a post about the principle of thankfulness that fits well with your list. The post is here:
http://successprofessor.ca/2008/10/12/the-principle-of-thankfulness

Again, such a great post.
Thanks,
The Success Professor - Danny Gamache

Eugene (Editor, Varsity Blah) Says:

October 28th, 2008, 0:48 am

I’d like to offer a quote from Melody Beattie: “Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.”

Amelia Says:

October 28th, 2008, 0:48 am

As part of our martial arts training we do a particular warm-up exercise called “gassho” which means “two into one”. It involves bringing your hands together as in prayer and take the time to be grateful to be able to train and live the life that we do. I don’t often take time during the day to be grateful however I find this simple act as part of my training uplifts my perspective on life. It is truly a powerful thing.
Cheers
Amelia

Avani-Mehta Says:

October 28th, 2008, 0:48 am

No matter where you are in life, things that you take for granted, is luxury for someone else. Show gratitude, always be thankful.

Mike Taylor Says:

October 28th, 2008, 3:14 am

Thank you for this post.
It is so easy to allow the negative to dominate ones thoughts.
Thank you again for prompting me to remember how fortunate I am.

Si Conroy Says:

October 28th, 2008, 3:18 am

Great post, thanks. I’d take a number of your list and take them an important step further. For me the word ‘compliment’ has always felt like one that belies it’s power on others. I would take your ‘expression’ of gratitude a step further and try on a daily basis to compliment others for the things that they do, new changes they have made for themselves etc. etc.

I’m constantly amazed by the power of this one practice. Is it because it projects a bridge of connection out to others? Because the effort involved in the seeing and awareness required to compliment well is an investment in taking time on others?

Clare Says:

October 28th, 2008, 3:47 am

Thank you for this article. Very well written and thought provoking. You are absolutely right how a bit of gratitude can transform a negative feeling into a positive one. It is easy to forget in our current society how many things we have to be grateful for.

jessica Says:

October 28th, 2008, 4:39 am

Once again Leo, you’ve looked into your crystal ball and written an article just for me! At least thats what it feels like :) Gratitude is exactly what I should be practising right now, rather than trying to compete and letting myself feel jealous of others. I don’t have a brand new car, and I dont have a fancy diamond ring, but I live in a wonderful part of the world, I still have my house after the financial crisis, I’m young, I have passion, and I have people who love me dearly. I’m forever the pessimist, but with little reason.
I have so much, thanks for the reminder.

Chris (from Lifestyle Project) Says:

October 28th, 2008, 4:43 am

Leo,

What a great message this post puts across. I really like the concept of turning a negative in to a positive as you show with many of these points.

A similar technique that I try and employ is that there are never problems, only challenges. With this method you turn a negative in to a positive. In a work situation, for example, I might not be able to get a software release out because of a bug (or more usually number of bugs!) in the code. Many people would see this as a problem to prevent a release going out on time, but I see it as a challenge to get the bug fixed in a timely manner and to a good standard to still meet a deadline.

Cheers,

Chris

Steve Says:

October 28th, 2008, 4:45 am

Hi Leo,
Another great post. The power of just gratitude and positive reframing is amazing. I mean positive reframing in the realistic “OK we have an issue, we’ll get through this, learn valuable lessons and still be here stronger afterwards” not the “I’ve been shot three times but everything is lovely” mould :)

This comes from someone who used be be so negative and cynical that if someone called me a cynic my response would be “yeah, you’re only saying that to try to make me feel better”

Anyway, I like to remind others that it is not so bad when they are complaining about trivialities. I do not have to wake up, walk 5 miles to get potentially diseased water, hunt for food etc.

Take care

Steve

Tabitha (From Single to Married) Says:

October 28th, 2008, 5:10 am

I completely agree with this! In fact, I try to write a “gratitude” post on my blog every Friday just for the reasons mentioned. I also find that in addition to gratitude, if you serve someone, your feelings toward them will improve. For example, if you are upset with your spouse, try to do something nice for them (as hard as it can be when you’re upset) and your feelings will start to change. It is hard to practice of course, but it works. It’s hard to have bad feelings towards someone that you’re doing something nice for. Goes hand-in-hand with gratitude. Great post!

Miss Attica Says:

October 28th, 2008, 6:06 am

Gratitude is a great attitude! Thanks again for a great post!

varia west Says:

October 28th, 2008, 7:24 am

thank you for all these little canddles of life.

VARIA

Jenn Says:

October 28th, 2008, 7:38 am

Gratitude lists are great!

banji - LessonInLife Says:

October 28th, 2008, 7:39 am

Pete really has an interesting point. I have always view gratitude in such way - When I’m feeling poor, look at those poorer than you, (can be used to other scenarios like bad luck, work related stress). But, I like how there are another point of view from that idea, that richer people does not necessary mean better people.

Of course I get what you mean Leo, I will continue with my current practice. In the end, what we want is to be grateful, the idea is for our own use only. And should never imply that we are better than the person next door.

Thanks both Leo and Pete

Leo Says:

October 28th, 2008, 7:43 am

Thanks for the nice comments, guys!

@jessica: Hey, don’t tell people about my crystal ball! They might start asking me to make predictions. :)

Claudia Says:

October 28th, 2008, 7:53 am

I think it’s posts like this and the powerful, profound ideas they contain - that are saving my life. I’m grateful to you for giving me a new way to look at my day, my surroundings, my family. Thanks.

Matthew Clark Says:

October 28th, 2008, 7:57 am

Attitude of Gratitude, such a great point. Life is a playground and we get to play everyday how can you not be grateful and in a complete state of gratitude for that privilege!

Make it great,
Matt

Eric Hamm Says:

October 28th, 2008, 7:58 am

This post rings 100% true with me. Especially the idea of showing gratitude over anger. There’s no more powerful way to avoid the dangers of hate than to override the emotion with feelings of gratitude.

Love is always stronger than hate in it’s purest form.

Jaiyana Says:

October 28th, 2008, 8:29 am

I am a bellydance teacher, and before every class I have all of the students do a moving mediation / centering exercise. The movements come from Indian classical dance, and they are used to acknowledge the space we dance in, the music we dance to, the people we dance with, our teachers, etc. It’s a fairly standard centering exercise done by many bellydance groups.

It’s amazing to me how spending one minute each day with gratitude can change your outlook. Gratitude is slowly becoming a habit, and that is transforming my life.

dr aletta Says:

October 28th, 2008, 8:34 am

Gratitude disarms the most determined foe, even the demons in my head. Saying “Thank you” is powerful kung fu.

Nick Says:

October 28th, 2008, 8:39 am

Great post! thanks for reminding us to be grateful for things - too often we get bogged down in our lives and can’t ’see the wood for the trees’. Especially when things are going badly gratitude can stop us in our tracks and help us.

Also, I suppose if you do it daily, then you could be less negative about your situation. We have SO much to be grateful for - even the often taken for granted things like breathing……

Chrissy S, OfficeArrow Says:

October 28th, 2008, 8:58 am

Thank you for this article, Leo. I recently recommended a few gratitude exercises to my father, who suffers from depression and anxiety. I forwarded a link to him so he can read that it’s not just me recommending this! You’re very eloquent and real about the ways this can help people. I appreciate it.

Maya Says:

October 28th, 2008, 9:51 am

A lot of the gratitude I express is for very selfish reasons - sometimes I think they give me a lot more joy than the person who receives my gratitude :).
6, 7 and 8 are great points. They really help me live through the hardest times in my life. Sorry about your recent losses Leo, but it is wonderful that you are facing them well …and really teaching your children, by example, the best way to deal with death and loss.

Big Blogger Says:

October 28th, 2008, 9:53 am

To #7 I would like to add that I like to think at the wonderful moments, sensations and experiences I’ve got with the deceased person, focusing on the good thinks and not actually thinking of the void that person left.

ciao
alexander

LisaNewton Says:

October 28th, 2008, 10:47 am

I totally agree with sharing the reasons you’re grateful with your child. I’d also take it a step further and share the reasons why you’re frustrated, and end the conversation with a “Thank you.”

If kids understand the reasons behind actions, they are more likely not to repeat the same mistakes.

Hey, it can work with adults, too………………..:)

Fit Bottomed GIrl Says:

October 28th, 2008, 10:55 am

I’ve started a gratitude list and it’s been amazing and giving me perspective in my life. We have a lot to be thankful for, but it’s easy to get caught up in negativity.

52 Faces Says:

October 28th, 2008, 11:10 am

This came at just the right time! We all have the critical voice ingrained in us since childhood.

It’s as if the Chinese culture in particular is organized around complaining and downplaying. Ah critical Chinese parents, how your love hurts!

Adrilia Says:

October 28th, 2008, 11:36 am

Beautiful post!

The practice of listing what you’re grateful for when having a tough day works wonders for me.

In the past few weeks I’ve had to say good-bye to 3 very dear people: my grandmother, the mother of one of my dearest friends, and a few days ago a dear friend and colleague who was quite young and lost her battle with cancer (or won her battle for freedom, however you choose to look at it).

So your post really speaks to my heart today.

I’m grateful for my health, the opportunity to live, eat, smell, breathe, run, be in a physical body, do work I love.

ZeroNews Says:

October 28th, 2008, 12:07 pm

I’m alive again.
I used to think about thinks I don’t have and forget those that I own.
I realized that thinking bad about others it’s bad also for you, because you stay focused about bad things.
Thanks for all your articles. I read all of them, but I don’t comment all - sometimes because of time, but I want to notice you that you do it well - maybe you already know.
Best regards,
Adrian

Angel Cuala Says:

October 28th, 2008, 12:10 pm

First of all, thank you for reminding us how important being grateful is.

Anyway, I am really surprised why there are people who are “ashamed” to say Thank You even for a very small favor, like giving way for them in a stiff corridor, and things like that. The same goes with saying “I’m sorry”.

As a father of 2 children, I am very strict about saying “thank you” especially to their mother even for small things like cooking for the food, fetching them from school.

One thing my family does everything that I think you should include is to say “thanks” before going to sleep. Although the day was hard, we should still be grateful that another day is over and we overcome all the pressure, things like that.

Thanks!

Derrick Says:

October 28th, 2008, 12:50 pm

Hey,

Thanks for the gratitude post. At one time the practice of gratitude was a huge practice in my life. And then it just sorted faded out. I stop thinking in terms of being grateful. And yea, it’s shown up in my life as a result. I’ve got to get back to doing that daily morning prayer of thanks and giving thanks throughout the day. Thank you!

Best,
Derrick

J.D. Meier Says:

October 28th, 2008, 12:59 pm

Hey Leo

Gratitude is the key. I find the happiest people focus on what they have, and the unhappiest focus on what they don’t. When you focus on what you’ve got, starting with your own growth, it snowballs.

Rodney Robbins Says:

October 28th, 2008, 13:25 pm

Is gratitude enough?
Is it enough that someone loved you, once, long ago?
Is it enough to say you’re sorry, or to forgive yourself?

Is simple, human kindness enough?
Is it enough to sleep the sleep of an honest man?
Is it enough to breath in and breath out?

Yes. Yes. Any one of these is more than enough.

Melissa Barnes Says:

October 28th, 2008, 15:58 pm

Gratitute exercises can be very powerful. Using them can make your life and days much better!!! We all can benefit from re-training to use these ideas!

Jean Gogolin Says:

October 28th, 2008, 16:20 pm

Re #5, it may be a comfort to know when your children are young and bugging you that by the time they reach their 40s, they can become your dearest friends.

Piki Says:

October 28th, 2008, 16:33 pm

Being grateful is good, but it’s also good to righteous. Do I really deserve this? YES!

Confident Nerd Says:

October 28th, 2008, 16:42 pm

I would like to add my own quote to this:

If you can’t show gratitude, then show patience.

Carla Says:

October 28th, 2008, 16:47 pm

Funny enough, I just posted about the exact same thing. But it’s about how gratitude has changed my life.

Thanks for the ideas!

My post:
http://www.carlakaywhite.com/2008/10/how-i-changed-my-life-in-2-months/

Miguel Wickert Says:

October 28th, 2008, 16:54 pm

Oh yeah, I’m a fan of all the advice here but it’s easier said, harder to accomplish, :) I like the make a gratitude list! Will give it try. I’ve developed a habit of reminding myself daily of the people, situations and things I appreciate. Cheers!

Michael Michalowski Says:

October 28th, 2008, 18:48 pm

great post, THANK YOU :)

AnnieK Says:

October 29th, 2008, 8:26 am

Gratitude is the great eraser of anger. It helps to put you in charge of your own happiness, not the people around you.
I use gratitude lists with my clients all the time. It helps people to focus on what works, not what doesn’t work.

With Gratitude-
thanks!

katy Says:

October 29th, 2008, 8:46 am

thank you so much for a beautiful reminder. I usually make gratitude lists when I’m feeling anything but. The good part says to make one; the bad part says*())*. So I write ten things. And if I don’t feel better i write ten more! then I read the list and I’m grateful. Not everyone can see, hear, etc. Not everyone has had breakfast. I cannot change the past or coulda/woulda/shouda on myself. I only have today.

And with gratitude, it is a better day because my attitude is better!

Today i am grateful for your post.

Clinton Armitage Says:

October 29th, 2008, 9:25 am

In the vein of this post, I would like to thank Leo for his gratitude theme. I have been going through a very difficult time over the past 4 months (its complicated) - pretty much lost everything important to me all at once. I read Leo’s post about being grateful, started a gratitude journal, and have found gratitude to be wonderfully positive in dealing with my challenges. Thank you Leo, I am truly grateful for your love sent out through your posts.

Jacqueline Says:

October 29th, 2008, 9:52 am

perfect timing on this one. I’m afraid I could have used these helpful reminders this morning when my children pushed me over the limit of sanity.. Hopefully, I

hernan Says:

October 29th, 2008, 13:49 pm

Necesitamos un cambio profundo,personal y de dar al
prójimo lo máximo, siempre q podamos

jessica Says:

October 29th, 2008, 18:08 pm

Gratitude + attitude = grattitude?
A nice mindset to be in!

Hot Alpha Female Says:

October 29th, 2008, 21:27 pm

I think that gratitude is one of the keys to fulfillment of life.

Sometimes we can have an amazing life experience and then we reflect back on that and realize that it only made us grateful for things that are in our life already.

Being happy with what you’ve got while striving for what you want, is one of the key to fulfillment and bliss.

I believe.

Hot Alpha Female

Daniel Richard Says:

October 29th, 2008, 23:34 pm

Thanks Leo for writing this post! It’s still the morning now and I guess this fits in the ritual gratitude point that you made in this article. :)

Demian Says:

October 29th, 2008, 23:57 pm

Leo, love the quote, love the post. When my 7-year-old daughter safely sailed through a surprise appendectomy today, all I could say was, “Thank you, God.” That seemed to suffice perfectly.

Steven Smith Says:

October 30th, 2008, 0:54 am

8. I like that part. Great focus for an article and direction to take attention. Focusing on gratitude shifts me from seeing obstacles to seeing past them into the gratitude beyond.

Thanks.

Because you use 8, I will link to this article on my Baguazhang site! Right here.

Joyous Living Says:

October 30th, 2008, 1:05 am

“If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, “thank you,” that would suffice.” - Meister Eckhart

Thank you!

Salutis Says:

October 31st, 2008, 2:56 am

Leo! Thank you for your posts like this. It’s just true.

Sanath Jayasuriya Says:

November 1st, 2008, 15:43 pm

Expressing gratitude and being kind and nice towards other people does effect the way you live and will bring happiness and joy. It is also explained in Buddhism.

Lauren Ford Says:

November 4th, 2008, 10:35 am

I really enjoyed reading your post. You have formulated such a wonderful list filled with concrete ways in which to develop gratitude. I find it is ever so easy to allow negative life events or emotions to dominate the day, but gratitude is definitely a way that each of us can work to improve our immediate wellbeing. I am about to earn my B.A. in psychology and I have been learning a great deal about the positive psychology movement which employs the idea of gratitude in its practice. In fact, Robert Emmons and Michael McCullough, two researchers within this field, consider thankfulness to be the “forgotten factor” in happiness research. However, in my pursuit to discover more about the implementation of positive psychology in daily life, I was somewhat disheartened to learn about the concept of hedonic adaptation as it relates to subjective wellbeing. Do you believe that regardless of how we approach life, we eventually return to a predetermined happiness “set point?”

You say that “there’s no doubt in my mind that the simple act of gratitude on a regular basis will change anyone’s life, positively and immediately.” While I agree that there are immediate positive effects of gratitude, I don’t know if simply giving thanks is a way to change one’s level of happiness on a long term basis. From a cognitive-behavioral standpoint, practicing gratitude could produce long term effects because it seems to resemble reframing. However, studies show that people who won the lottery or got married eventually returned to their pre-win or pre-marriage “level” of happiness. Do you think that we acclimate to being thankful?

Jane Says:

November 7th, 2008, 6:39 am

I particularly agree with #3 - when someone does something to annoy me, I often fall into the trap of assuming they’re out to get me and getting obsessed with how I can neutralise the bad effect they’re having on my plans, rather than seeing them as an ally and getting excited about the ways they can help me. People usually surprise me with how open they are when you present something in a positive way, so I often find it’s useful to assume that whatever faux-pas they made was just a blip in a wider context, move beyond whatever they did to bother me, and try and approach them with a request for assistance which not only cancels out the original behaviour I objected to, but also adds some new value. Not only do you avoid arguing and souring the relationship, you also stand to gain more from the exchange. Most people will become more caught up in what you’re saying if you’re focusing on positive things they can do, and it encourages them to see you as an ally and ask you for help too.
Obviously there will always be certain people who genuinely are out to get you but they’re usually in the minority and even their hostility can sometimes be diffused or at least bypassed by an approach which focuses on what you want to achieve and how they can help.

Ivan Zuzak Says:

November 14th, 2008, 4:47 am

I totally agree with #6 - “When you face a major challenge, be grateful for it”.

When I started seeing problems as opportunities to overcome those problems, my life changed in a very positive way. Challenges are opportunities to win something and succeed, not opportunities to worry we will fail.

Great post!

Seduction Says:

November 15th, 2008, 3:19 am

I can’t believe I stumbled upon this today… just a few hours ago I was listening to Tony Robbins talking about how gratitude was one of the best ways to become wealthy.

I’ll definitely be applying myself to stay focused on being grateful. Thanks