By Leo Babauta

I’ve talked with a number of people recently who have gotten caught up in fretting about something in their lives — something stressing them out and causing them to overthink.

Maybe they’re worried about a stressful situation, or they’re worried they’re not doing well enough in life. They get caught up in rumination, stressing, spinning around in circles.

I tell them that it’s just fear.

It’s just fear that makes us overthink, worry, ruminate, spin around in circles. It’s fear that we’re not good enough, that we’ll fail, that someone will be unhappy with us, that we’ll look like idiots. Just fear.

I don’t mean to dismiss the fear or invalidate it — fear is natural, and a part of being human. It’s OK to have fear, and it’s a part of doing anything meaningful or difficult.

But fear also doesn’t have to be a big deal. That’s why I say it’s “just fear.” It’s not significant unless we make it to be. I like to say No Big Deal when I notice my fear.

When we notice the fear, we can also notice the stories our fear tells us: I’m not doing good enough, maybe I should be doing what those people are doing, maybe people are going to judge me, maybe I should quit.

And I can decide not to take the stories too seriously. It’s just fear.

Noticing the fear, and the stories from the fear, helps me to calm my fear down.

How to Deal with Fear & Overthinking

My fear also wants me to do something about the scary situation — but often there isn’t too much I can do. I might try to take action, but more likely I’ll either lash out at someone else … or get caught in overthinking. Neither is helpful, of course.

If I’m overthinking, here’s how I can deal with it:

1. Start with noticing the fear and the overthinking. The fear isn’t a big deal.

2. Pause and breathe. Slow down the breathing.

3. Reassure my fear: we got this. No big deal. We can handle the situation, even if we don’t know exactly how it will turn out. This is a practice of trusting ourselves to handle whatever comes.

4. Relax any tensed muscles, and continue with the slower breathing.

5. Focus on something lovely in this moment. The light in the room, the nature around you, nice company, something to bring curiosity about, something to be grateful for.

This is how to practice. Keep doing these things: noticing, breathing, reassuring, relaxing, and focusing on the present moment. If you do these things, you’ll drop from the overthinking into the present.