12 Ideas for Establishing a Calming Routine
Every Wednesday is Simplicity Day on Zen Habits.
One of the most rewarding changes in my life in the last couple of years has been finding peace with a morning routine.
I’ve made it a habit to wake before most of the world, at about 4:30 a.m., and just enjoy the quiet and solitude.
It has made all the difference in the world.
I sit quietly with a cup of coffee, and enjoy the silence. I go for a morning run, which relieves stress and is perfect for contemplation. I use the quiet time before my family awakes to write something each morning. I read, as a good novel is one of my favorite companions.
Now, not everyone is a morning person, of course. But that doesn’t mean you can’t create your own routine, one that incorporates something that gives you solitude, quiet, or stress release. While morning is an ideal time for such a routine, other ideal times are after work and before bed — and really, any time that works for you is good.
I recommend that if you haven’t yet, you create your own calming routine. Give it a couple of weeks to become a habit, focusing on doing it every day, and soon, you will not want to miss it.
Here are just a few ideas to get you started:
- Morning coffee. If you’re not a coffee person, tea or cocoa work great as well. Sit and enjoy the silence as you wake up, and even better, watch the sun rise. It’s the perfect way to greet the day.
- Exercise. I like to go on an easy run. It relieves stress, and gives me time to myself to think, and enjoy nature. Evening runs are great too, especially as the sun goes down. If you’re not into running, walking, cycling, swimming, or really any exercise works well. Just take it easy in the beginning, and try to do a little every day. Don’t overdo it.
- Meditation or yoga. I haven’t been meditating on a regular basis, but when I do, it’s so calming, and so centering. You don’t need to do anything formal — simply focusing on your breathing, as it goes in and out, is a good meditation. While I’ve never been into yoga, I know a lot of people who swear by it, and I would recommend you give it a try if it sounds appealing to you.
- Gratitude session. This is one of my favorite rituals: every day, take a couple of minutes to think about everything and everybody you are grateful for in your life. This may sound corny, but it is an amazing ritual. Try it right now — it only takes a minute. Who are you grateful for? What are you grateful for? I’ve found that this little ritual has so much power that it makes me happier and more compassionate. Btw, every time I do it, I thank the people who donated and helped me become a giant step closer to my dream (that’s you guys!).
- Goal mantra. This is another one of my absolute favorites. I got the idea from Guy Kawasaki, who tells us that corporate mission statements are basically useless, and recommends you create a corporate mantra instead of three or four words (tops). So instead of creating a corporate mantra, I created a personal mantra to remind myself of why I do everything I’ve been doing this year (with the blog, all my writing, and some new projects that are coming up, including an e-book). Here it is: Liberate Yourself. And I just make sure to repeat this mantra at least once a day (if not several times). It helps me stay focused. I suggest you do the same for your personal mission.
- Evening review. I think this would be an especially fruitful routine for anyone. Basically, it’s a routine that Ben Franklin did himself: he would spend some time at the end of each day to review how he did with his goal, and reflect on how his day went. It only needs to take a few minutes, but just go over your day, think about your goal (your mantra), what you did to further that goal, what you did right and what you did wrong today, what you can improve, what you need to do in the future. If you want to journal this, it would be even better!
- Bath time. My home doesn’t have a bath tub, but I truly cherish a long hot bath. If you have the time to do this, it can be extremely relaxing.
- After work unwinding. Long day at work? Stressed out? Take 30 minutes to unwind. Some great ideas for that: a 20-30 minute nap, snuggling with your kids, deep breathing, stretching, self-massage, or really anything that relaxes you.
- Pre-bed ritual. Another ideal time for a calming routine is just before you go to bed. You can do any of the calming things mentioned in the other items, or just develop a routine: get clothes ready, get lunches ready, clean up, brush teeth, decide on your three Most Important Tasks (MITs) for tomorrow, etc.
- Journaling or writing. A morning writing ritual is a good thing, but you can do a writing ritual at any time that works for you. Or instead of writing, try journaling. It can be very productive and relaxing.
- Conversation. Try this: every night for an hour, just sit and talk to your spouse. Share the highlights and lowlights of your day, talk about your goals, your finances, your relationship, movies, music, books. This can, of course, be adapted for conversation with your children.
- Reading time. Ah, one of my favorites. Take time each day to spend with a good book. Or a trashy novel. It doesn’t matter. I actually like to take time in the morning and evening, but whatever time is convenient for you will work.
Do you have calming routine? Tell us about it in the comments.
See also:
- How to Find Peace Living With a Packrat
- Book review: Simply Your Life
- 20 Ways to Get Free or Cheap Books, and Give Away Your Old Ones
- 15 Ways to Create an Hour a Day of Extra Time … For Solitude
- The First Rule of Simplifying: Identify the Essential (or, How to avoid the Void)
- Are Your Days Crazy? Take Control
- Edit Your Life Part 1: Commitments
- Edit Your Life Part 2: Your Rooms
- Edit Your Life Part 3: Closets and Drawers
- Edit Your Life Part 4: Your Work Space
- Edit Your Life Part 5: Your Wardrobe
- Edit Your Life Part 6: A Media Fast
- Edit Your Life Part 7: How to Dross an RSS Feed
- How NOT To Multi-task: Work Simpler and Saner
- Slow Down to Enjoy Life
- Zen Mind: How to Declutter
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- Posted on 25 July 2007 in Simplicity |
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Comments (26)
Simplex Says:
July 25th, 2007, 7:18 am
Great post as always. This is my favorite blog. I’ll think of a mantra for me.
May I suggest something? You could get a P.O. Box. I’d like to send you a book (I am not the author) for you to review if you wish, or just read. Maybe authors could do the same. And you could make a wishlist, so readers would have an additional way to show they are grateful.
Marco Says:
July 25th, 2007, 7:36 am
Yogi do Sadhana, Communism had early morning exercises, and some of us have jogging&stretching: the value of morning exercise and relaxation cannot be underestimated: good point Leo!
“Sadhana, daily spiritual practice, is the base, the foundation of all spiritual endeavor. Sadhana is your personal, individual spiritual effort. It is the main tool you use to work on yourself to achieve the purpose of life. It can be done alone or in a group. Sadhana is whatever you do consistently to clear your own consciousness so you can relate to the infinity within you. Before you face the world each day, do yourself a favor and tune up your nervous system and attune yourself to your highest inner self. To cover all your bases, include exercise, meditation, and prayer.” by Shakti Parwha Kaur Khalsa
Johnny-johnny Says:
July 25th, 2007, 7:39 am
Great post, I’m curious and very interested in your 4.30am start to the day. I just wanted to ask; when do you go to bed and when do you get to sleep?
Brad Isaac Says:
July 25th, 2007, 8:26 am
I enjoyed reading your post. I use several of your ideas. Exercise is an important part of my daily routine. Every evening my wife and I walk for 45 minutes. This is the time we talk about our day and I bounce new ideas off her. I also have my alone time, usually after the kids are both in bed for the night. Journaling is my vital routine of the day. This is when I reflect on my day and brainstorm for my future.
Alex Shalman Says:
July 25th, 2007, 9:07 am
Thank you for this post Leo. Morning routines (especially those that include exercise) are the perfect start to a day. Leo often talks about MITs (Most important things of the day) first - and what’s more important for your health than exercise (next to eating healthy).
Johnny-johnny, I’m also curious to see when Leo goes to sleep for the night. I’ll estimate around 10pm.
Brad Isaac, I like how you kill two birds with one stone - walking and talking with the wife ;)
My favorite thing about waking up early is getting that time to yourself before everyone else wakes up - that’s priceless.
Balfour Says:
July 25th, 2007, 9:12 am
I’ve been getting up at least a couple hours before I need to go to work or anywhere for years now. When I started that, it was to meditate and do spiritual reading. After years of doing it, I dropped it (who knows why) and just read newspapers instead. Still relaxing to not have to rush out and have plenty of quiet time before the day began. Throw in running at times too. Then, stopped reading the newspapers a few years ago and just started reading enjoyable relaxing things. Now, I’ve started a new routine of meditation, spiritual or self-development reading, and journal writing each morning.
Morgan Says:
July 25th, 2007, 9:57 am
Definately love my mornings for quiet reflective time. Even if it is mundane tasks like cleaning out the dishwasher, it is alone quiet time. I sleep in on weekends til 6:30 and still get quiet time in before the wife wakes up.
Leo Says:
July 25th, 2007, 10:44 am
Well, everyone has different sleep needs, so I wouldn’t really compare yourself to my sleep pattern. However, I try to get to bed between 10 p.m. and 10:30 … although it’s often later than that. In truth, I’ve found I only need about 6 hours of sleep. Any less than that, and I will be very tired through the day. Right now, because Eva and I stayed up watching a DVD together, it is very late for me … 12:40 a.m. I doubt I’ll get up at 4:30, but I’ll probably be up before 6 a.m.
As you can see, I don’t always get up at 4:30 a.m., although I would say I do get up at that time on the vast majority of days. If I stay up late, I get up later.
Again, everyone has different needs. Some people need 8 or 9 hours of sleep, and there’s no shame in that … people are just built different.
Thanks everyone for the nice comments! I’m enjoying reading about the rituals of others. :)
Modern Worker Says:
July 25th, 2007, 11:32 am
I’m still striving to wake up even earlier, but reading, drinking tea, and exercising throughout the days have bettered my mood considerably. The extra time in the morning also allows me to get to morning appts on time, every time.
Jennifer Says:
July 25th, 2007, 15:00 pm
This post fits in perfectly with what I posted on my own blog today.
http://sobahmysoul.blogspot.com/2007/07/another-morning-routine-post.html
I decided that my goal mantra will be, “Glorify God by Living Gloriously!”
Georgio Says:
July 25th, 2007, 15:09 pm
Excellent post again Leo. Keep up the great work! You really make a big difference for us with your great advice. Thanks!
Alex McFerron Says:
July 25th, 2007, 15:21 pm
I love this posting. I have an addition to the evening review that I made up. I call it Small Corrective Actions. So, if I did something during the day that caused me regret I just make a list of small corrective actions I can do the next day to avoid the same pattern. This has helped me a lot to let go.
mack Says:
July 26th, 2007, 0:55 am
I practice yoga every day and walk for an hour. When I was younger I really pushed myself to reach a target heart rate and to achieve mastery of advanced asanas. Now, I walk at an easy pace and really enjoy the scenery, the beauty of the trees and the sky. My yoga practice is very simple, like a self massage.
Isobel Says:
July 26th, 2007, 2:59 am
I like to get up early, too. Quiet time, alone is a good start to my day. My favourite Calming Routine isn’t so much a routine as just something I do a lot during the day - stroke one or both of my cats. Just lying on the bed or the floor, stroking their silky fur, calms me down such a lot. I believe I can feel my blood pressure dropping with every stroke.
Emma Says:
July 26th, 2007, 3:41 am
I woke up grumpy for years. Lately I’ve been talking to my boyfriend for at least 30 minutes before bed. I wake up happy, balanced, and refreshed each morning. I used to cram in all my homework before I slept and would fall asleep (and wake up) grumpy. I’m not a morning person, but having an unwinding time right before I sleep is amazing.
Alex Ion Says:
July 26th, 2007, 5:47 am
I can see the difference when you start blogging again :)
I like your style, I enjoy your ideas!
Great job!
Red Zinnia Says:
July 26th, 2007, 6:07 am
Great post. I follow many of these practices. My favorite is the quiet morning time. I love that part of the day, plus the rest of the day just seems to flow better when I’ve had a couple early hours by myself to think.
I really like the mantra idea, I’m going to work on that.
Thanks!
~ Lisa
macewan Says:
July 26th, 2007, 6:41 am
Morning time gets my vote also. Perfect time to gather your thoughts for the day.
After work I turn to gardening which in my case is weeding or extending the brick paths in the yard.
materialBITCH Says:
July 26th, 2007, 9:56 am
Great article… but I suggest replacing Coffee or Tea with Grey Goose vodka. This definitely reduces some stress.
Also, before I would do my walking exercise I would partake in a shot or two of Tequila.
Rep the brand,
http://www.materialbitch.com
needmorezen Says:
July 26th, 2007, 16:05 pm
I love to get up early and paint. If I can, I wake around 4 or 4:30 a.m. There is something so nice about the quiet and darkness. I get up, make myself a cup of tea, get the watercolors out, and sit with my piece for an hour or so. I usually put on some Native American flute music which is so inspiring. It feels good knowing I’ve worked toward my goal (one of them anyway), and I am being useful and creative.
I agree about the meditation, tho I too don’t do it religiously either. It is a great way to focus on your day and when I did it steadily for a 3 wk period, I swear everything seemed so much better and calmer. It really is great.
Love your blog BTW!
Wake Up Early Says:
July 27th, 2007, 9:22 am
Great article, was worth digging for sure, though I don’t quite agree the routine should be “calming”. I’m trying to make my morning routine energizing so I’m ready to meet the new day and new challenges. But the most important part is indeed to have a routine, to make your morning flow. I’ve even utilized GTD for this :-) - http://www.howtowakeupearly.com/GTD_for_early_risers_create_a_morning_ritual.aspx
//Cheers,
//SleepingDude
Lance Manion Says:
July 27th, 2007, 23:18 pm
The most important way to start your day are by following the way of the 3 S’s.
S hit
S hower
S have
In that order. The order is very important for obvious reasons.
Repeat daily and your life will never be the same again.
cwith Says:
July 30th, 2007, 1:03 am
For me, it has to be putting on ambient music early in the morning :)
Events Says:
August 25th, 2007, 2:41 am
I agree with what “Lance Manion” had to say about the 3S’s, although I would add enjoying some Coffee in the morning and some soothing music in the evening. The 3S’s come somewhere in between.
Pedro Says:
August 27th, 2007, 11:42 am
Hi, my calming routine varies according to my working schedule. Since I work in shifts, like this week I’m working from 11am till 08pm, the next week I’ll be working from 08am till 05pm. So I don’t have a routine, or a specific hour of the day to calm myself.
I have however several moments of the day where I simply enjoy my own presence.
There’s one thing that I do religously. As a smoker, I often go to a garden with a lake that my company has in front of my building, and spend a few minutes just smoking a cigarrete and enjoying the birds, the trees, the wind and the frogs on the lake. I’ve found out that not only it was most relaxing but the animals begun to trust me and came to me as if they wanted to keep me company.
And that’s about it for now.
It’s very good reading you.
Best regards
PP
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