By Leo Babauta

Changing a habit — whether it’s forming a new one like journaling, or quitting an old one like smoking — can be a frustrating endeavor for a lot of us.

The way it usually goes: get started when you’re struck by motivation, commit as hard as you can, and then kind of white-knuckle it for a week or two. And then life happens and you fall off. And feel bad.

Does that feel familiar? Most people will usually conclude that it’s something wrong with them — you don’t have enough discipline, maybe.

But it’s not about discipline, or how hard you try: it’s about how you’re going about it.

There’s one shift that can change everything — and that’s identity. How do you see yourself, as you create this habit change?

How Identity Changes Habits

The shift is from asking “what do I want to do” to asking “who do I want to be?”

There’s research-based evidence behind this, and I’ve seen it in my own work helping people change habits. Instead of depending on motivation and willpower to fuel your change, you see the habit as an expression of how you see yourself.

Some examples from my life:

• Exercise: From “I need to make myself work out to be healthy” to “I’m a runner who lifts weights”. Or “I’m someone who moves my body regularly.”

• Meditation: When I resist meditation, and try to force myself to be disciplined about it, I struggle. But when I just think of myself as someone who meditates daily, it becomes much easier. And when my meditation alarm goes off, I now think of myself as someone who just gets up and goes to meditate, and that drops any egoic struggle.

• Quitting smoking: When I was smoking, I thought of it as the way to cope with stress, and give myself something pleasurable. When I quit, the shift was that I stopped thinking of myself as a smoker and thought of it as something I just wouldn’t want to do.

The same kinds of things happened when I started thinking of myself as a vegetarian, then a vegan, a marathoner … these just became who I was.

How to Make the Shift

Start with a simple declaration — a statement of who you are becoming: “I am a writer.” “I am someone who takes care of their body.” “I keep my word to myself.”

Then take small actions to vote for that identity. Small things like a 1-sentence journal or a short walk absolutely count.

Then acknowledge the action and how it is a part of this identity you’re becoming.

Give yourself some grace for not being perfect at it. You’re becoming this new version of yourself, but there’s always a transition period. The direction of the trend is what matters.

This isn’t just a habit strategy — it’s a new version of yourself that you’re creating, a new way to relate to yourself. Don’t wait until you already feel like that person. Take action to create this identity.